Still....

Oct. 2nd, 2006 06:10 pm
mogwai_do: (eyebrow sex)
[personal profile] mogwai_do


Twice Shy - Part Three continued...

*****
Tully sighed, put his pen down, and pushed the last of the papers aside; it was 6pm and he was technically off duty now, well, as off duty as he could be with the War still going on. He didn't even have to escort Adam anywhere this evening; the Group Captain had dropped by not an hour before to collect Adam for some meeting and had assured Tully that the code breaker was not his charge for the rest of the evening. It had probably been meant as a kindness, giving Tully a bit of a break, a chance for some time alone - the problem was that what Tully really wanted was time alone with Adam.

Their aborted lunch had left Tully unsettled; he had barely said a word to Adam then, not about anything important, and he regretted it now. He *should* have said something, even if he didn't know what. At the time, part of him had still been amazed that Adam voluntarily spent time with him, but another part was beginning to recognise that the code breaker really had been sincere in his promise to help.

Adam had been busy all afternoon, or at least he hadn't left his office until he'd left for the night, and Tully hadn't been able to come up with even a half-believable excuse for him to go in. It didn't help that Ann was there also, making privacy impossible.

Tully sighed and began to tidy the various papers away; it was Friday night and technically tomorrow was his day off, but all he wanted to do was curl up and sleep it away. He was still tired from his week of insomnia and it didn't help his confusion at all. He wanted to just *be* with Adam for a while, until he could sort out what he felt from what he feared. He *wanted* to believe Adam had meant what he’d said when he had claimed to want this... affair to continue, but past experience and his own self-doubts were a formidable opponent after so many years of reinforcement. The code breaker had filled a need somewhere that the Wing Commander had managed for years without and now suddenly it seemed the most vital thing, he felt hollow inside without it. God, he was pitiful.

Tully levered himself up from his chair and closed up the office. He would go and he would get drunk and maybe, if he were lucky, he would see Adam tomorrow.

The pub was only just beginning to fill when Tully arrived at half past seven and ordered a whisky, much to Edna's surprise though she said nothing. Tully felt no particular desire to enlighten her either as he took his drink and made his way to a back booth where he wouldn't be disturbed. He just kept getting more and more pathetic, yet some small corner of his mind persisted in hoping for the impossible and he knew that if Adam just gave him the slightest encouragement, intentional or not, that small part would break free and he didn't know what he would do then.

The door opened and a knot of soldiers came in, talking, joking and laughing amongst themselves. It was impossible not to recognise the familiar voice among other familiar voices. Adam had a wicked laugh.

From his booth Tully watched them all settle around the squadron's usual table as the drinks were carried over; a space was made for Adam and he fitted in as if he'd known them all for years. At that moment Tully envied Adam's ease like nothing else; he was so tired and seeing Adam so comfortable in the company of others that small hope withered and starved yet somehow still clung stubbornly to life. So for the next half-hour Tully continued to watch Adam with the others; the man was impossibly likeable and Tully wasn't sure whether to be jealous of Adam or of the airmen. But he wanted to be there, wanted to know if Adam was as understanding with the others as he had been with Tully, if it was something the man did automatically or if it was reserved only for a special few.

It wasn't that he didn't trust Adam to keep a secret, or maybe it was... No. Nothing Adam had said or done suggested that the man would betray him like that. Perhaps it was simply that he was afraid Adam would find the company of the others more entertaining than anything Tully could offer. He knew where he would want to be anyway, if he ever thought for a moment that he could be accepted as one of them. But he wasn't, he was an officer, with duties and obligations and... inclinations...

Tully took another sip of his whisky, he wasn't much of a drinker really, but he was sorely tempted to get really stinking drunk tonight. He wasn't officer material and he knew it - so did every other officer he met; the Group Captain at least tried not to make it too obvious, tried to make it easier on him. They were laughing again, he wondered why this time and hoped it wasn't at him. Struck with sudden panic, he hoped Adam hadn't been treated to the stories they had about him, true or false, he wasn't sure he could bear that. It was one thing to know you were incompetent, quite another to have it pointed out to your lover in excruciating detail.

His gaze slid to Edna at the bar as she poured pints for the group's next round; she glanced up, feeling his eyes on her, and he quickly averted his gaze. He wasn't sure he could take her teasing tonight, he'd end up losing it, saying something about him and Adam and then he would never be able to forgive himself, quite aside from any other consequences it might have. After watching him for a long moment she returned to her job and Tully breathed a deep sigh of relief. The soldiers were laughing now at something Adam had said and Tully felt something fierce swell inside him - he wanted to go over there, to sit next to Adam and make it clear to everyone that at least one person didn't seem to think him an idiot. He couldn't of course, it was just the alcohol talking, and the feeling died. He sighed and took another drink, hoping the burn of the whisky would clear the tight feeling in his throat.

Adam was getting up now, wandering over to the bar to get another drink and chatting to Edna. She didn't try flirting with Adam, Tully noticed, and he wasn't sure if that made him glad or annoyed that she didn't seem to see what she was missing out on. Adam was gesturing with his hands as he explained something, long fingers weaving an elegant dance, mesmerising young officer and barmaid alike. Inevitably Tully's eyes travelled from Adam's hands to the rest of his body; the broad shoulders and straight back, narrow hips and long, long legs. Embarrassingly he found his eyes drifting to Adam's backside, looking for the brief moments when his movements caused the otherwise loose cloth to tighten. Tight muscled and loose-limbed - certainly no-one could accuse the young code breaker of having a pole lodged up there...

Tully flushed at the inadvertent thought and took a quick swallow of his whisky hoping to distract himself and nearly choking in his haste. But the thought, once touched upon, wouldn't be banished. It had been there, lurking in the back of his mind, unacknowledged, since that first kiss. All the unformed yearnings of the last few years had coalesced with frightening speed once given a focus. People *knew*, without ever really being told, what it was that homosexuals did and he wanted to do those things with Adam. When he tried to think about the mechanics of it, he really wasn't sure at all, but somehow the *idea* of having Adam inside him still held its appeal. But Adam might not want that, might not do that. What they had done together... that night and the next morning... well it seemed to prove that Adam was comfortable at least with... things, but that didn't mean... And Tully certainly had never... Just because he'd never denied the feelings he'd had for years, it didn't mean he'd ever really thought about acting on them, he'd been too scared, as if people would somehow know.

Adam was moving again, all lithe grace, and Tully knew he was staring. He knew he shouldn't, knew he should stop, but somehow the frantic message never made it to his eyes. He had held those narrow hips, had his hands on Adam's backside and pulled him close and Adam hadn't seemed to mind at all and now Adam was coming towards him. Tully took a quick sip of his drink at the rush of tactile memory, feeling himself grow hard and thankful the table hid that fact from his friend. He couldn't do this and yet he knew he would - he hadn't drunk nearly enough really. He wanted Adam; he wanted Adam to want him back. He wanted to do things with Adam that he was quite sure he'd never be able to admit to anyone else - he wasn't sure he could even admit it to Adam yet. He watched silently as Adam slid onto the bench opposite with a smile that Tully tried hard to return. "Hello," there was a warmth in his voice, but Tully found it too difficult to return Adam's easy cheer. "Tully? You okay?" such concern, if he was going to do it at all, it had to be now.

"I..." he stumbled at the first word under Adam's concerned eyes. How could he ask this of *anyone*?

"How much have you drunk?" Methos asked, concerned and curious. The young commander didn't seem like much of a drinker, but he could well understand the need to shelter in alcohol when faced with seemingly insurmountable problems. It just remained to be seen which of Tully's problems required it. Tully's dark eyes rose to his, a little glassy, but still far from drunk.

"Not enough yet," the young officer replied with effort, "it's still too hard."

With effort Methos bit back on the obvious joke and bravely fought his smile as he asked, "What is?"

Tully sighed and took another sip of his drink, his attention remaining stubbornly on his glass when he spoke again, "Do you remember saying I could tell you anything?"

Methos frowned and nodded, not entirely sure where the conversation was heading, but a little worried by the fact that it was clear the young man wasn't drunk, or at least not so that he didn't know what he was saying.

"What if I said I wanted you?"

Methos shrugged with a gentle smile, "I'd be flattered."

"And if I said I wanted more of... of... what we... did... before?"

Methos' smile deepened, his young double was obviously working up to something and Methos was quite confident he could cope with whatever his lover had in mind. Then Tully's voice dropped so low that even as close as he was, Methos had to strain to hear it.

"I want to know what... what you feel like... from the inside..."

Methos felt his heart stutter to a stop and then resume at twice the speed. This was... unexpected. Tully was slowly looking up now to meet Methos' eyes and Methos honestly didn't know what his expression looked like.

"And I want to know... what... what it feels like to... to have you inside of me," Tully's stumbling words were strangely endearing as he struggled to explain what he wanted with a vocabulary that had never included such things.

Oh God. Methos felt his cock harden almost painfully as his throat went dry, such a simple, honest statement of desire - it pushed all his buttons - hard. He almost couldn't believe the young commander had braved it; he was fairly sure that were their situations reversed he never would have.

Taking Methos' silence as rejection or horror, Tully suddenly became intensely interested in the contents of his glass, drawing in on himself even as Methos watched. Damn. The old Immortal cast a glance over at the soldiers in the far corner, they weren't looking this way and the walls of the booth were high - they wouldn't see. Methos stood abruptly and despite himself, Tully's head jerked up in surprise. Then Methos quickly leaned across the table, slid his hand behind Tully's head and drew him into a hot, hungry kiss.

For an instant the young commander was too shocked to respond, then he was pushing his glass aside and reaching for Methos' shirt, both hands fisting in the fabric, holding him in place as Tully opened hungrily for anything and everything Methos was willing to give. Teeth clacking and lips bruising in the sudden voracity of the kiss.

They lost themselves in mutual need until a loud laugh startled them apart, both of them looking around guiltily to see if they had been noticed. Around them the lively evening atmosphere of the pub remained unchanged. Methos breathed a sigh of relief and almost laughed when he felt its echo wash over his skin.

"Sorry," he murmured with a smile that said he was anything but and eased back into his seat. Under the table he hooked one of Tully's ankles with his foot and brought it up to where he could reach it with his hand. Tully looked puzzled, but allowed the action without comment as Methos drew the foot up onto the bench between him and the wall - well-hidden. Almost absently Methos began to lightly stroke his lover's ankle and calf while he took a much needed drink of his beer. Tully watched him curiously for a moment as if waiting to see what he might do next, but when Methos seemed content simply with that touch, Tully began to relax once more.

Seeing the young officer ease back in his seat, Methos felt the tension ebb from his own body. The kiss had satisfied the first rush of hunger Tully's admission had sparked and now all he felt was a steadily building anticipation. Methos slipped his hand beneath the hem of Tully's trouser leg and brushed his fingers lightly over the delicate skin of the narrow ankle - innocuous touch. He smiled across at his look-alike lover and was rewarded with a hesitant half-smile that warmed the dark eyes. Methos supposed they had said all that needed saying for the time being, in words or otherwise, but it rarely paid to rush these things, especially when dealing with things as delicate as a lover's self-perception. They finished their drinks in companionable silence and Methos watched the young man quietly for a long minute afterwards, unable to quite keep the small smile from his face. "So," he began, trying to affect an air of nonchalance and failing miserably, but he didn't care. "Were you planning on staying here long?"

*****

It was an effort to maintain a casual front as they walked back. The streets were virtually deserted and strangely dark with all the blackout precautions in place. Tully kept abreast of Adam and struggled to match the easy pace he set; part of him wanted to hurry to the sanctuary of their quarters, the rest of him wanted to hang back, half-afraid of what he himself had professed to want. Tully cast a glance over at his friend's distinctive profile; for all they were near-identical, he found it impossible to think any of Adam's features overlarge. What was on him a combination of faults, on Adam somehow became something greater than the sum of its parts. Adam's expression was perfectly calm, at ease, but Tully felt so nervous he thought he might jump out of his skin at any moment. How could Adam possibly be so calm about it all, especially after that daring kiss in the pub. Tully still couldn't believe he'd done that, even if no-one had noticed.

Lost in the recollection Tully almost didn't register when Adam abruptly stopped in his tracks. The young commander glanced around, trying to discern some reason why; they were about two-thirds of the way home in the narrow country lanes prevalent in the area. They were quite alone, the trees looming large and dark on either side of the road. Tully looked to Adam for a reason, in response the code breaker flashed a wicked grin, teeth gleaming bright in the darkness, and disappeared into the brush at the roadside.

Startled, it took Tully a moment to react, but he followed his friend determinedly; quite aside from personal concern, it was his duty to look after the young code breaker. Leafy branches closed around him and the darkness became almost complete, the road blocked from view. A hand on his arm made him jump, but it was only Adam, close enough that, even in the darkness, Tully could still make out the amused expression on his face.

"Adam, what?" he had meant to ask Adam what he was doing, but the words became a soft gasp as first feather gentle fingertips then soft lips, ghosted over his skin, tracing the contours of his face with dedicated care. When his back hit the tree trunk it surprised him as much as the fact that it jolted his eyes open when he hadn't even been aware of closing them. Tully saw Adam's face bare inches from his own, beautiful eyes luminous with something he hesitated to call desire, but had no other name for. Adam's head tilted slightly as he appeared to study Tully's expression for a long moment.

"Hmm, stunned," he muttered, half to himself, "Not *quite* the look I was going for." And before Tully could say a word one way or the other, Adam decided to take the direct approach, his lips connecting with Tully's solidly.

The young commander didn't even manage a gasp this time as he felt Adam's clever tongue slip between his lips to coax his own to life. Tully realised belatedly that his eyes had slipped closed again, but it didn't matter, every other sense had been enhanced. He could feel the rough bark of the tree against his back, the heat of Adam's body in front, even through the thick cloth of his uniform. The scent of unidentifiable flowers and shrubs mixed with the fading smells of the pub that clung to them both, smoke and wood and alcohol. Adam's own scent lurked beneath both, hauntingly elusive. Adam tasted of beer and chocolate he must have eaten earlier and something almost familiar that demanded further investigation. Tully nibbled at Adam's lower lip without even thinking and was rewarded with a sudden hungry deepening of the kiss. Thoughtlessly daring, Tully slipped his arms around Adam's back, feeling the muscled contours through the thin sweater. Almost of their own volition his hands slipped lower until they rested just above Adam's backside, his fingers playing with the hem of the sweater.

Adam pulled back slowly and a little regretfully and Tully bit back a groan of disappointment. They were both gulping air just a little and, in the semi-darkness, Tully could see that Adam's lips were swollen and his normally pale face was flushed. Part of him wondered if he didn't look much the same, but he dismissed it quickly; there was a freedom in all of Adam's expressions and movements, an ease that Tully envied. Adam was comfortable in his skin and Tully wistfully wished that he could find that ease himself, with Adam's help maybe it was even possible.

When Adam spoke, Tully's heart thudded so loudly he was sure Adam must have heard it, along with the thoughts that wouldn't leave his head. "This is where I really wish I'd waited until we'd got back to your room," Adam's voice was rueful and he shook his head, chuckling slightly at his own impatience. Tully had no idea what to say to that or even whether he should say anything, he felt so terribly out of his depth. Then he felt Adam's hand slip into his own, tugging him away from the tree and back toward the road.

By the time they reached the narrow lane, the most obvious evidence of their activities had faded a little and they brushed the odd stray leaf from each other; by the time they reached the entrance to the base there was nothing untoward about their appearance at all.

Once inside the barracks though, their steps got progressively slower. Methos could understand that; there was a kind of inevitability in the air and he'd always been one for choices. Nothing was inevitable, impossible or unalterable - he knew it better than most and was eternally thankful for it, his youthful mortal doppelganger hadn't yet learned that lesson.

"I need to get something from my room," he offered to the silence between them and Tully looked at him, expressionless, before nodding acknowledgement. Methos gave his lover a small smile and slipped inside his room, giving the young officer the time to think that he so obviously needed.

Tully continued down the corridor to his own room, unlocking the door and stepping inside. He took off his jacket and tie and hung them up in a haze; since the brief interlude by the roadside he had felt like he was functioning on autopilot. The wardrobe door swung closed easily and he turned back to his room and it was as if, the most obvious reminder of his status gone, he could think about this in terms of what *he* felt.

He was going to let Adam... No, he *wanted* Adam to... Did that make it better or worse? And they were going to do it here, in his room. He wasn't sure who had decided what, where it would happen or when, but that it had been decided was undeniable. There was a certain level of trepidation attached to that decision too, as if the location would somehow make it more real, as if it would bring it into the life he had tried to live - except that was pure fantasy, it had always been a part of his life, he had just tried his best to ignore it until now. Tully was still staring at the bed when there was a soft knock at the door.

Methos slipped through the door as soon as it opened wide enough. It was a little early yet for the other occupants of the building to be returning, but he hadn't made it this far by taking unnecessary risks. Tully shut the door behind him immediately, flicking the lock down automatically. Giving his lover a few more moments to gather himself, Methos didn't turn around until he had placed the small jar of cream on the bedside table. The young officer seemed torn between staring at the bed and staring at Methos, barely acknowledging the jar and its implications in his distraction. "Tully?" Methos called softly and the hazel eyes slowly turned to him, "We don't have to do this, you know."

Tully blinked, "You don't want to?"

It was Methos' turn to be caught off guard at the odd mixture of resignation and dread in that voice. He reached for Tully's hand as he stepped closer to his lover and drew it down to where his growing erection pressed against the fabric of his trousers. "I want to," he breathed sincerely, "But if you don't, it's better that *we* don't, you understand?"

Tully's eyes, dark with so much confused emotion, drifted down to where his hand still loosely cupped Methos' length. They flickered up again almost immediately, searching Methos' face and seeing only simple honesty there. The hand tightened its clasp slightly and Tully stroked the trapped shaft once before he closed the gap between them.

Methos gasped into the kiss as Tully's body pressed the length of his; the warm fist around his cock and the determined, devouring work of his lover's mouth blanked his mind. He moaned encouragement as he felt Tully's free hand wrap around the back of his neck, holding him in place as the young officer deepened the kiss even further, his tongue making ever more daring forays. Methos surrendered helplessly to his lover's insistence, Tully being the aggressor was as much a turn on as anything the man actually did. His fingers scrambled for the buttons of the uniform shirt, eager for the feel of skin, even as his cock thrust greedily into Tully's long-fingered grip, which moved accommodatingly. God, the boy learned fast.

It took a moment for his brain to catch up when Tully pulled back slightly to catch his breath, Methos' own limits not yet reached. Tully hadn't the benefit of Methos' experience, or his Immortality - he had to remember that. He focused in time to see Tully's eyes, deep green now and vibrant with a peculiar mixture of lust and earnestness.

"I want to," Tully whispered, voice deep and husky, so very different from its usual proper tones. It took Methos a moment to parse the odd statement, but when he did, his hands abandoned Tully's now open shirt to pull the young officer's head close for another hungry kiss and it was Tully's turn to moan.

"How do we...?" Tully tried to ask between the end of that kiss and the beginning of the next.

"Bed's best," Methos managed to reply before returning again to his lover's mouth.

Tully's shirt was gone and he didn't remember losing it. He was sure the fact should have bothered him more than it did, but Adam's shirt was already falling from his shoulders and the feel of warm skin beneath his hands was too good to spoil with such distractions. He could feel Adam's thigh nudge between his legs and he was obeying the movement before his brain registered that Adam was edging them both closer to the bed. It took great presence of mind and no small effort of will for Tully to part from Adam long enough to strip the blankets from the bed to land in a tangled heap on the floor and, almost immediately thereafter, Adam and Tully ended up in a tangled heap on top of the bed.

Adam wriggled beneath him, nimble fingers working the belt and fly of Tully's trousers, pushing them and his underwear down and off. Then Adam was rolling them both over to rid himself of his own remaining clothes. As the sudden weight of his lover pressed over him, Tully froze, every muscle screaming with tension, and there was no way Adam could miss it. Tully closed his eyes tight, not wanting Adam to see the shame he felt as he forced himself to breathe. There was a pause and then he felt the softest touch of lips against his brow; Adam's weight vanished and he felt strangely bereft.

Tully waited a moment more before he cautiously opened his eyes again to see Adam sitting on the edge of the bed, trousers unfastened, but still on. "Adam?" the word slipped past his lips without any reference to his brain and Adam offered him a soft, almost sad, smile. Tully suddenly felt enormously guilty for his reaction, for all he himself had never expected it. How could he explain? He wanted to do this, more than he'd wanted anything in the longest time, yet somehow he couldn't seem to lose the fear.

Adam's smile softened further still and his finger traced a long line from Tully's shoulder down to his hand. "It's okay, I understand. I'll get over it." Adam's tone suggested he was trying to lighten the moment, but the words cut into the young officer anyway and he curled his hand around Adam's when it strayed close and held on tight.

"I'd rather you didn't have to get over it, Adam - I *want* to do this." The vehemence in his tone seemed to surprise Adam as much as it did himself. "I just..." Tully struggled to find the right words, "don't know how to stop... being afraid."

Methos smiled at the hesitant admission - he knew all about fear. He'd caused it and felt it, used it and been ruled by it - admitting it was always a good start. Slowly, so as not to startle the young man, Methos leaned in and claimed Tully's lips for a lingering kiss, gratified by the instant welcoming response. Whatever Tully felt, it wasn't fear of *him*. Methos let the kiss deepen slowly, moving slower still as he shed his remaining clothes, putting himself on equal terms with his lover. The unknown was always the worst fear, but even that could be dealt with if it was handled with care. Methos eased himself back onto the bed at Tully's side, wary of a tension that didn't return.

Tully felt the warmth of Adam's naked body shifting closer, but it was easier to stay relaxed with such lavish attention being paid to his mouth. Although one part of him was most certainly not relaxed and he squirmed a little in pleasure as he felt his lover's hand curl around the needy flesh. Then Adam was suddenly above him, pinning him only for a moment, before he slid down onto the other side between Tully and the wall, leaving the young commander the open side of the bed. The kiss broke with a soft, wet sound; Adam's eyes were smiling a little hesitantly, but Tully found himself smiling back. How could this be so easy and so very difficult at the same time?

"I want to do this," he repeated softly, as much for himself as for Adam, "But I can't... do it... by myself."

Adam's face lit up in a broad grin, "Of course not," he exclaimed in mock astonishment, "Where would the fun be in that?"

Tully found himself chuckling in response to Adam's mischievous humour, but part of it was sheer relief that Adam didn't seem to mind Tully's dependence in this. And then they were kissing again, hot hands exploring, for the first time unhindered by clothing or blind lust. Adam's body felt good beneath his fingertips and it seemed to Tully that he had never really appreciated their sensitivity for the wealth of information they were giving him now. Adam's skin was warm, almost hot, silky skin taut over firm muscles that seemed more than a code breaker would need, not that he was complaining. A tiny portion of his mind wondered what Adam had been before the War when he felt the hard calluses on Adam's hands as they fanned across his back - a farm worker perhaps, though given his education it didn't seem likely. Tully let his own fingers play over Adam's chest, feeling the strength and breadth of it, enjoying it. His hands rubbed across Adam's nipples and he felt them peaking beneath his palms, almost of their own volition, his hands slid lower to the ridged abdomen. Then they were daring lower still, sliding around the base of Adam's full cock - he wanted that.

Adam sucked in a breath and Tully looked up through his lashes, seeing the hesitant pleasure on his lover's face. Determined to reward his friend for not leaving, Tully leaned in and lapped softly at his lips, refusing to make it more until Adam groaned in frustration. But there was a bright sparkle in Adam's green eyes as Tully finally deepened the kiss, seeking out his lover's tongue and drawing it into his mouth in turn, enjoying Adam's eager response. He groaned deep in his throat, Adam's hands were on his hips, a comforting touch as Adam began a slow, thoughtful plundering of his mouth. It felt right this release of control, this acceptance, to be able to simply drop all the defences and pretences he had to maintain in his daily life. He felt Adam's long legs slide against his own, tangling comfortably and easily as they kissed and petted. Last night had been quick, unexpected and overwhelming, a flash-flood of desire that had, for a short time, overcome his defences. And he could have recovered from that - maybe. Adam's behaviour the next morning and now were patiently, but determinedly eroding those defences. It couldn't be long before they all slid into sand, but Tully couldn't find it in himself to regret it, nor did he want to, and maybe that was where the fear had come from, not from the actions at all.

Adam was above him now, supporting his weight on his hands as the kiss stretched on and on. Tully was starting to see stars by the time it finally broke, but he thought he would have been quite happy to keep on until he passed out, if Adam wanted to. He felt the touch of lips at the hollow of his throat and the tiny flicker of a wet tongue then the teasing touch was gone again - to reappear over his right nipple. How could a man's lips be so soft?

Soft, coaxing touches then a light nip of sharp teeth made him writhe gently beneath his lover. "Adam," he breathed and received a kiss to the sensitised flesh before Adam swapped sides, treating the left with as much care and attention as he had the right.

The young commander felt like he was melting under Adam's heat, turning into some warm, viscous goo only defined by Adam's hard hands and soft mouth. A tiny nuzzle against his belly and then Adam was slipping lower, tilting his head until Tully's cock slid against the arch of that elegant throat, the faintest prickle of stubble teasing his nerves. It took a moment for the languor he felt to recede enough for him to realise that Adam was regarding him quite seriously.

"Adam?" it was an effort to speak, he felt heavy, weighted with arousal, but his mind was floating and didn't quite seem to want to reconnect with anything but the sensations Adam was inspiring in his body. Adam's eyes held Tully's for a long moment and then he shifted slightly, turning his head so he could slide his parted lips along Tully's erection. The sensation was as soft as the others had been, but applied directly to his needy cock it sent a fizzle of hunger straight up his spine. Tully drew a sharp breath and, as if that influx of oxygen was all he had needed, he suddenly realised what Adam was asking of him - if it was okay, if it was still what he wanted.

Tully made the effort and nodded, one hand moving of its own volition to touch Adam's hair where it fell loose around his face. Adam leaned into the light caress with a smile and then he was shifting forward again, dragging his lips the length of Tully's cock. Up and down and up again, then those soft lips closed over the head of his cock, tongue teasing the slit. Tully gasped as Adam played, flickering his clever tongue up and down and over the sensitive shaft until Tully thought he might just explode. But Adam moved again, releasing the straining column of flesh, now hypersensitive to even the warm air of the room. Adam hadn't stopped though, he had merely changed his focus and now he mouthed one taut ball, then the other, nuzzling until even breathing was a challenge for the young officer and he was gasping like a landed fish. Adam was looking at him again with those smiling eyes, one hand on Tully's right leg, stroking lightly with just the tips of his fingers.

"Bend your knee a little," Adam murmured softly.

Still struggling to regain the power of speech, Tully half wanted to ask why, but since he guessed the answer might well terrify him, he focused instead on Adam's steady gaze and let his lover rearrange him to his satisfaction.

Adam's eyes sparked wickedly in the low light, "Don't worry," he murmured, dropping a quick kiss to Tully's inner thigh as he moved it, "You'll like this."

The smoky, self-assured tones thrilled Tully more than any of the soft touches had done - those had relaxed him, soothed him, this... this made him tingle and throb and ache. He could see laughter now in his lover's eyes at whatever his expression reflected and then Adam was leaning back down, lips parting. These caresses were hotter, wetter, more demanding than before, drawing Tully from his languor and building a fire low in his belly.

"Mmm," he hummed deep in his chest; the words just weren't there to describe how he felt as Adam's lips and tongue and occasionally teeth, feasted on his body. Adam hummed back at him, the difference being that Adam had his mouth full. Tully jerked and shivered as the vibrations seemed to travel from his balls, up his spine and forced their way out of his mouth on a groan. He didn't even recognise his own voice anymore.

Then he was released from the warm haven of Adam's mouth once more and he shivered at the brush of air over his skin. But Adam was already travelling lower, his nose nudging gently at Tully's balls as he began a pattern of tiny licks and kisses to flesh Tully had never realised could be so sensitive. His ability to breathe deserted him again; he was gasping and panting and hoping to God Adam never stopped. Tully started to reach for his cock, aching for the promise of Adam's mouth, but not sure he could wait long enough for that promise to be fulfilled. Adam's hand got there before his, long fingers wrapping comfortably around the hard shaft.

Tully groaned, his head falling back onto the pillow as his hand dropped back to the mattress and he arched his hips up into the slow stroking Adam began. Time seemed to disappear for long moments at a stretch as he lost himself in the twin sensations of Adam's mouth and Adam's hand and he writhed gently against invisible bonds he wouldn't dream of breaking.

When he felt Adam's hot, slick tongue flicker over his anus he gasped, every muscle in his body going rigid with shock and anticipation at that intimate touch. And before Tully's brain had quite caught up with the sensations, his body had made its decision and was shifting to accommodate anything Adam wanted to do, spreading his legs wider, shifting his hips to give his lover better access. Another wet brush of Adam's lips and tongue and Tully decided his body had absolutely the right idea. He moaned in frustration when Adam retreated, agile tongue tracing wet patterns over the sensitive skin of his inner thighs. Warm breath ghosted over his cock and balls and he found himself shivering again - with need. Every touch of Adam's, every kiss and lick and nip, was somehow just not quite enough. Even now, Adam's warm hand wrapped around his cock was forcing him to a slow, but by no means easy, pace. Holding his lover's eyes, Adam's tongue flickered out to touch the head of Tully's cock, lapping delicately at the fluid gathering there. Then Adam was shifting, his weight leaving Tully's legs, and he felt a small kiss drop onto his hip.

"Turn onto your side."

Tully found himself obeying the soft-spoken command without thought or hesitation, glad of it when he felt Adam's weight settle again next to him, around him. Adam's hand still stroked his cock and he glanced down to see Adam rest his chin on Tully's hip, watching the young officer carefully for signs of distress. Apparently seeing none, Adam dropped another kiss to the prominent hipbone and slid down behind his lover, his hand leaving the straining cock to stroke a long thigh. Tully found himself raising that leg, moving it forward a little in response to Adam's touches. A faint uncertainty as to what his friend had in mind began to grow, but before it could take firm root, warm breath blew softly into the crease of his backside.

"Oh," part surprise, part pleasure and Tully realised his body was reacting without him again, moving his legs a little further apart, making it easier for Adam to do... whatever he was going to do. Tully didn't have long to wait as a hot, wet tongue touched the small of his back, soft, repetitive licks, before it slid a little lower, exploring slowly. Tully squirmed at the unfamiliar sensation, but he was a long way from wanting it to stop. "Adam," he breathed, not sure if it was encouragement or simply a shape to give the sigh of pleasure. It certainly wasn't any kind of protest.

Methos smiled against Tully's skin and continued his journey down, savouring the taste of his young lover and the implicit trust of the situation. He had no intention of rushing this, but he soon reached the tightly furled muscle guarding the entrance to his lover's body and he altered his grip slightly as he remembered Tully's earlier reaction to it. A soft, circular swipe of his tongue and he felt the young man shudder, a low moan drifting on the heated air of the room. He did it again and Tully arched back against him in an unmistakable request for more - Methos was only too happy to oblige.

Adam's... oh God. Adam's tongue was... inside him and... Tully groaned, he couldn't help it; he was going to explode, he was sure, and he clutched at the sheets desperately to stop himself from reaching for his cock. He was pushing back for more, greedy, hungry, and the tiny portion of his mind still functioning could hardly believe this of himself. He shifted his hips a little, pressing his cock into the mattress, trying to ease the almost unbearable ache there. He wanted so badly he couldn't speak to ask, even if he had known what to ask for. He could only hang on and hope that Adam understood this as he seemed to understand everything else.

Tully was making almost constant soft, mewling noises and Methos wondered if the young officer was aware of it. The body beneath his hands and mouth was hot and slick with sweat, pressing back against him with a kind of liquid undulation that spoke eloquently of need. Unsure of his lover's limits, Methos hadn't intended to draw this out as long as he had, but... Tully was taking everything he offered and still asking for more and Methos was helpless to stop himself giving it. But at least one of them had to hold onto a little sanity or neither of them would make it.

With a last, lingering kiss to the relaxed muscle, Methos sucked his index finger into his mouth, wetting it thoroughly, all the time keeping up the steady touches to his lover's body with his other hand. If he had judged this wrong, he wasn't the only one who would regret it.

He withdrew the finger, dripping with spit, and leaned forward again to probe the tiny furl, feeling it give easily to his questing tongue. Then he drew back slightly to a soft, broken moan from the young commander, and this time he quickly slid his finger inside before the difference could register. And it did. Methos felt the muscle clamp down hard around him as Tully went absolutely still, a harsh breath escaping him.

"Adam?" Tully's voice was small, almost frightened, but not quite, not yet, just... not quite sure. Methos eased up the long body, being careful not to move his finger as he placed a soft kiss on the point of a shoulder.

"It's okay," he murmured in what he hoped was a reassuring manner, "It's just my finger, nothing more unless you say. I promise."

Tully seemed to consider that carefully, his breathing deliberately slow and even, "Just your finger?" he repeated and Methos smiled gently, though he knew Tully could not see it.

"Just my finger, I promise."

Tully drew a few deep breaths and Methos waited, absolutely still. Then one of Tully's hands reached back toward Methos and the Immortal kissed the fingertips that came within reach.

"Okay," Tully murmured, voice barely audible as he drew his hand away, but Methos was paying more attention to the way the tight muscle slowly relaxed around his finger. "Okay," Tully breathed again and Methos pressed a kiss between Tully's shoulder blades as he slowly began to move.

It was easier than he'd thought it would be, the muscle more relaxed, Tully's trust in him running deeper than he could have expected. Methos silently promised to reward that trust as he slowly began to rotate his finger within the tight clasp of Tully's body, not really stretching yet, just getting his lover used to the feel of it. The spit didn't quite erase the friction of the touch; it was enough for this, but not much else, not with a virgin. Methos glanced with some dismay at the small jar on the bedside table; ideally he would have planned this better, but he hadn't wanted Tully to feel trapped between himself and the wall. Carefully he slid his finger out and, hoping his lover's courage would hold, he leaned close to Tully's ear. "Could you pass me the jar, please?"

He wasn't surprised to feel the momentary tensing in the body pressed against his, he had expected at least some hesitation, but then Tully was reaching for the jar with a hand that barely shook at all. Methos suddenly felt inordinately proud of the young officer and he pressed haphazard kisses to the bare skin of his neck and shoulder in reward, as he took the proffered jar and quickly unscrewed the lid. Methos coated his fingers thoroughly in the slippery cream, warming it before he did anything else.

Tully felt Adam's warm touch against him, slick with the contents of the jar; what it was he hadn't dared look, part of him couldn't believe he'd actually given it to Adam like he'd asked. Gentle, circling touches distracted him from his thoughts, not as soft as his lover's tongue, but not so dissimilar either. The steady pattern against his skin was almost hypnotic as it slipped into rhythm with his breathing, not threatening at all. Adam's finger breached him again and he knew he had tensed at least a little, but Adam made no comment. And it wasn't really an unpleasant sensation, just... unfamiliar.

Then Adam's finger pressed deeper, touching something within him that lit sparks behind his eyes and caused the erection that had wilted somewhat to revive with a suddenness that made him gasp. "Adam?"

Tully felt his friend nuzzle the back of his neck, tongue flickering out to taste, "Tell me to stop and I will," Adam promised softly as his finger shifted again.

Tully shook his head quickly as more sparks raced up his spine, "No," he gasped desperately, "don't stop."

He felt Adam nod and then, "Tell me if it hurts."

Before Tully could ask what, he felt a second slick finger pressing into him and he bit his lip. It didn't hurt exactly, just... twinged sharply, but he wasn't going to make Adam stop for that. The twinge faded soon enough anyway and he relaxed again, finding himself almost used to the intrusion and Adam's steady pace. It didn't really feel bad at all, especially not when...

His thoughts splintered and broke as he felt Adam brush whatever it was inside him that made him want to scream - in the best possible way. The slight discomfort as Adam scissored his fingers going virtually unnoticed in the wash of sensation.

"Adam," Tully drew the name out on a moan, not entirely sure what he was asking for as he arched back against his lover, but knowing the need was real. A third finger joined the other two and it burned a little, but he couldn't care less, it only added to the incredible sensations. He was hot and breathless and he could feel Adam against him, inside him, and all he could think was that, wonderful as it was, it wasn't enough and he was certain Adam knew how to make it better. "Adam," it was difficult to speak past the sensations sizzling along his nerves, but he had to, "More - please."

Methos felt his cock jump at the pleading sound of his lover's voice; Tully was writhing now, almost fucking himself on Methos' fingers, his breath coming in pants and whimpers. This was going to hurt no matter how careful he was - the first time always did, and Methos was half afraid he wouldn't last long enough to make it better if he didn't do it now. He had known Tully wanted this from the beginning, the man had even told him so, but he hadn't realised that he himself had wanted it so badly. He had thought they might get as far as fingers before Tully needed to stop, but right now there was no doubt they were going to go all the way.

Carefully Methos withdrew his fingers and reached for the jar again, trying not to hear the young man's heartbreaking little sound of loss. He brushed his lips over damp skin, concentrating on the taste and feel of it, rather than on the sensations as he slicked his aching cock. Then he gathered more cream on his fingertips and spread a little more around his lover's opening, surprised when Tully suddenly pushed back at the touch, taking his fingers inside easily. Methos half chuckled, amazed at his own level of arousal and that of the young officer, they were both so far gone it was amazing they had lasted this long.

He nipped lightly at the hot skin beneath his lips as he withdrew his fingers again in punishment for threatening his rather limited composure. Then he was leaning close to his lover's ear, unable to resist just a tiny lick, "This will hurt a bit, but it will get better," he whispered the promise as he guided his cock to the entrance of Tully's body. It surprised the Immortal not at all this time when Tully pressed himself back onto Methos' waiting erection.

Methos bit his lip hard as the head of his cock pushed past the almost too tight muscle, stopping himself from coming with an effort of will he rarely had to use. Past the roar of blood in his ears, he heard Tully bite back a startled cry and instinctively wrapped his arms around his lover's chest, holding him close, holding them both together, inexpressibly relieved when Tully's arms wrapped around his own holding on just as tight.

Tully tried to catch his breath, tried to think past how *huge* Adam felt inside him, nothing like the gentle fingers or soft tongue, but at the same time he couldn't bring himself to wish he'd stopped there. This was more - exactly what he'd asked for, what he'd needed.

His fingers knotted with Adam's and he could feel his friend's lips resting lightly against the back of his neck, waiting, the soft gusts of Adam's breath teasing his oversensitive skin. The burn was fading now as he breathed, swallowed by the return of that terrible empty ache.

"Adam?" his voice didn't sound quite right to him anymore.

"Yes?" Adam's voice was just as quiet, just as soft.

"Now?" was all he managed to say, not quite sure how to ask for the rest.

One of Adam's hands freed itself from the tight clasp and slid around to Tully's hip, holding him firmly, but gentle all the same. And then Adam was moving, pressing in slowly and steadily in one long, breathless slide of slick flesh. Tully moaned long and low at the sensation - this was Adam, this was Adam *inside* him and it felt... so...

He very nearly screamed out loud as the shift of Adam's cock touched that place inside him and sent lightning arcing up his spine. Adam's hand slid from hip to belly, just resting flat over the skin; it was a comforting touch, as if Adam would hold him in, hold him together, and Tully realised then that Adam was all the way in, so deep inside him. Tully released a slow breath; he could feel Adam's forehead resting against his nape and the heaving of his chest, and he found himself smiling, glad to know he wasn't the only one so badly affected.

Unable to resist, Tully raised the hand he still clutched almost bruisingly and placed tiny, sucking kisses on each sensitive fingertip. Adam shuddered against him and the sound that escaped was half chuckle, half groan as Adam's free hand drifted down to wrap around Tully's cock.

"I'll take that to mean you're okay," Adam's voice was breathy and affectionate, if slightly strained. Tully didn't bother trying to answer that, but nipped playfully at the pads of the long fingers, hearing Adam's gasp just before his own escaped as Adam slowly withdrew almost his entire length. A rolling undulation of his hips and then he was gliding back in again, a little faster than he had the first time. Tully released Adam's hand, his focus lost under the sensation of Adam moving in and around him.

A groan was dragged from his lips when Adam's hand on his cock tightened slightly as it stroked up his length. Instinctively, he tried to buck into that sensation, but Adam held him still and Tully found his double's greater strength a comfort. Then Adam was moving again and this time his cock and his hand moved in counterpoint, leaving Tully no room for breath between the sweet sensations, torn between pushing forward into that warm grip or back onto his lover's cock. Oh God. Oh. *God*. He was going to... Oh. Please. He couldn't stand it, he wanted to, *needed* to come, but he *couldn't* let this end. Another smooth thrust and he gasped, he'd heard about fireworks, but... *God*. "Please," it was a pathetic mewling plea, but Tully didn't care; there was only him and Adam and this enormous, bright, terrible thing between them.

Methos moaned against his lover's skin; his senses were filled with the scent of their arousal, the beautiful, needy sounds Tully made, the smooth heat of his skin and the even hotter clasp inside. Trying to keep this slow and easy was going to kill him. How had he managed to forget how good this felt - not just the sex, but the warm, more-than-willing flesh, the simple welcome of another's body. Love might have its lofty spires, but simple affection was a foundation and Methos valued it as highly, it was usually a good deal more reliable. He pressed wet, open-mouthed kisses to his lover's already damp skin, catching tiny beads of sweat on his tongue as his rhythm began to quicken out of his control. But from the sounds Tully was making, he rather thought objection was possibly the last thing on the young commander's mind.

Tully groaned in a peculiar mixture of satisfaction and want as Adam began to move faster, harder, his whole body was on fire, reacting to his lover on pure instinct. Liquid lightning traced his nerves and he clutched at the sheets, almost ripping them and not noticing. Then the angle of Adam's thrusts changed slightly and it set off a wild, rippling chain reaction, searing along his nerves, looking for a way out.

Tully howled, his cock pumping out what felt like his entire life into Adam's still moving fist. A muffled cry and a sharp pain in his shoulder and it felt like he was trying to come again in the midst of his climax, his whole body contracting around Adam's cock as he felt a wetness bloom deep inside him.

Continued...

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